Teach me how to breathe again

So there we are, Zach was having a few beers and I was on my second mixed slushy Tastefully Simple drink . We are, as usual, watching DVR'd episodes of The Office and it is almost over. This is good, cause I was very tired! I heard a child up in the bathroom (which means it is Riley, Dec wears a diaper at night) and it sounds like he is throwing up.

He is not throwing up. He is literally unable to get a good breathe of air. He is so congested (but was absolutely fine three hours ago, when he laid down for bed) and is gagging but won't or can't cough any of it up. And he is scared. Panicking, pretty much. Which is only making it worse.

Zach had asthma from approximately age 4 until he was just about in high school. We are always waiting to find out that Riley has it too...he gets winded easily when running around and even his tantrums border on the hysterical.

Whether or not his hysteria is a flaw of his personality or his lungs remains to be seen.

After several failed attempts to get him to calm down, I grabbed a pair of socks and his snow boots and shoved them on while Zach ran out and started the car. He whisked Riley off to the ER, but not before I dumped a pack of the Muccinex crystally stuff down his throat.

Then I threw up my entire dinner (which was pretty big, since I had dinner with a friend out) and waited for my parents to get there so I could go to the hospital too. My mom stayed with the slumbering Declan while my Dad drove me to Hershey Med. We used to live right across the street from there. Don't think that fact escaped me as we made the twenty minute drive.

Riley did breathing exercises with Zach the whole way there, and was only wheezing slightly and coughing a lot easier when they arrived. He was pronounced pretty congested but not in any danger and a follow up appointment to check for asthma suggested.

By the time I got there, he had stickers and was proudly showing me his little hospital bracelet. Have you ever for one fleeting moment been able to see everything so clearly?

We got home around 12:30 am and Riley proudly told his GaGa all about the hospital, wide awake. This morning he was excited to tell his little brother about everything he missed while he was sleeping "like a baby".

I have had a few moments in my life where I am not sure if everything will be okay. A dark, snow drifting road is scary enough without wondering if your heart is still beating up ahead.